my inappropriate nephew...

[sporkium]

so, i have to stay at home today and watch my nephew (9) and niece (7) because their parent's have gone shopping and they didn't want to spring for an actual baby sitter. 'baby sitter' might not be the correct word here because as i have learned today, my nephew might be inappropriate, but he's fucking rad. i taught him well.

so, i'm in my office drinking southern comfort, watching all the resident evil soundtracks download and looking at a passive resistor catalog when my nephew comes in, sits on the couch looking bothered and audibly sighing and all.

me: 'whats up little man?"
him: 'i'm bored.'
me: 'why? i just put on that smurf movie for you to watch.."
him: 'fuck that faggot shit.'
me: *sprays southern comfort all over my desk
      'nice... ever seen akira?'
him: 'nu-uh.'
me: *starts up akira on the ipad; hands it to the little awesome dude*

***about half an hour later or so***

him: 'BOOBS!'
me: *looks up from catalog*
      'if you keep pushing the back icon, it looks like they are jiggling. today you are a man.'

[AliShibaz]

There is no other feeling in life like the molding of a young mind.

Congratulations!

[Mark]

Cheers.

Saturday I taught my 7-year-old niece the word 'aidz' but first I had to explain 'AIDS' and afterward I had to explain 'expulsion'.

[sporkium]

lollolollol... i can imagine her telling everyone they have aidz...

i'm thinking the little aspiring monster might get to watch 'ninja scroll' next... that anime is really kinda wild.

[Mark]

I feel that the uncle is definitely supposed to be an influence of free-thinking and rebellion. Its our job.

[Togachu]

Poor parents that have to deal with the consequences after

[sporkium]

interesting... children can eat three bags of potato chips for dinner and still have room for a pint of ice cream each... who'd a thunk it?

i don't see why people say that raising children is difficult... this shit is wicked easy.

fightclub time!

[Mark]

pmsl <-- we need that smiley.

Fuck it I am going to get a shit load of beer and go troll somebody hard as fuck . . .

. . . need to call up the niece for a ride-along

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notice the curve ball into topic

[sporkium]

topic sopic... this thread will end up in the pit eventually.

'pmsl,' eh? i always hated that little bit of fluffy girl jargon.

you know... they are getting picked up around 2130 hours... think i should let them binge on mountain dew starting at 2100 hours?

[Spud17]

I adore having my nephew and nieces over. As an auntie or uncle, our duty is to be simply awesome