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The Irish joke thread
#21
Paddy and Paddy, two Irishmen, went out one day and each bought a pig.

When they got home, Paddy turned to Paddy and said,
"Paddy, me ole mate, how we gonna tell who owns which fookin' pig?"

Paddy says "Well Paddy, I'll cut one a ta' ears off my fookin' pig, and ten
we can tell 'em apart"

"Ah tat'd be grand" says Paddy.

This worked fine until a couple of weeks later when Paddy stormed into the house.

"Paddy" he said "Your fookin' pig has chewed the ear offa my fookin' pig.

Now we got two fookin' pigs with one ear each. How we gonna tell who owns
which fookin' pig?"

"Well Paddy" said Paddy "I'll cut ta other ear off my fookin' pig. Ten we'll
av two fookin' pigs and only one of them will avan ear"

"Ah tat'd be grand" says Paddy.

Again this worked fine until a couple of weeks later when Paddy again stormed into the house.

"Paddy" he said "Your fookin' pig has chewed the other ear offa my fookin' pig.
Now we got two fookin' pigs with no fookin' ears! How we gonna tell who
owns which fookin' pig?"

"Ah tis is serious, Paddy" said Paddy "I'll tell ya what I'll do. I'll cut
ta tail offa my fookin' pig, ten we'll av two fookin' pigs with no fookin' ears
and only one fookin' tail."

"Ah tat'd be grand" says Paddy.

Another couple of weeks went by, and you guessed it, Paddy stormed into the

house once more. "PADDY!" shouted Paddy "YOUR FOOKIN' PIG HAS CHEWED THE

FOOKIN' TAIL OFFA MY FOOKIN' PIG AND NOW WE GOT TWO FOOKIN' PIGS WITH NO
FOOKIN' EARS AND NO FOOKIN' TAILS !!
HOW THE FOOK ARE WE EVER GONNA FOOKIN'TELL 'EM APART?!"

"Ah fook it!" says Paddy "How's about you have the black one, and I'll have
the white one."
LMAO
You Give To The World When You Give Your Best To Somebody Else Hug
Reply
#22
Paddy thought his new girlfriend might be the one but after looking
through her knicker drawer and finding a nurse's outfit, a French
maids outfit, and a police woman's uniform, he finally decided if
she can't hold down a job, she's not for him.

==============

Paddy is doing some roofing work for Murphy He nears the top of the
ladder and starts shaking and going dizzy. He calls down to Murphy
and says "I tink I will ave to go home, I've come all over giddy and
feel sick."

Murphy asks "Ave yer got vertigo?"

Paddy replies "No I only live round the corner."


=================

After its 100 years lying on the sea bed, Irish divers were amazed
to find that the Titanic's swimming pool was still full!

=================
I don't sugarcoat anything.....do i look like willy fucking wonka to you
Reply
#23
(04-18-2013, 08:33 AM)zeberzee Wrote: =================

After its 100 years lying on the sea bed, Irish divers were amazed
to find that the Titanic's swimming pool was still full!

=================
LMAOLMAOLMAO
consistency is the hobdob
of small minds[
Reply
#24
[Image: Irish-Joke.png]
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
- Robert A. Heinlein
Reply
#25
[Image: Luck+o+the+Irish.+Title+is+a+joke.+Have+...927380.jpg]
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
- Robert A. Heinlein
Reply


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