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I don't want to be myself
#1
I went through 90% of my life wanting to be someone else.
I have no social skills, I shiver when I talk in public, and I constantly am jealous when I see people be brave, smart, and charismatic in public and here I am just like "Uhh... Hi."

People can be themselves comfortably, but I...
When I try to crack a joke, they cannot understand. I understand their jokes, but people joking that my sense of humor is too "unreachable' has become a meme around here in itself. It says a lot when I watch a show about an immortal little girl being trapped in what is practically a silent prison for an eternity, and I want to become said girl. Anything but this life.

I was told that I am smart, good at this and that subject, but I cannot find it in myself to believe that I am the nice things they described. Is there any way to actually accept myself?
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